Jambatan roboh lagi??

I don't know why that sometimes I can be too sensitive. Sometimes I can swallow all the jokes, sarcastic words or harsh words dumped at me. But sometimes, a small thing can be a BIG factor to me.

That's what happened between me and my guy collegue here. There were few times when the bridge between us just collapsed, all work related. I guess my sensitiveness at that time blows the hell out of me. So, when he tried to ask me somethg after that, I just snapped at him. So, from there I guess he knows I'm boiling mad at him. A very small matter when I think of it, but my bad temperament had causes the London Bridge to fall down. U can ask Bro Frank on this, dia dah masak ngan perangai I..kan Bro Frank?

He tried to send me few funny-funny emails to make amend thing. But I couldn't be bothered to reply. Eventhough I've calmed myself down, I guess ego has taken its place. Then, I took a drastic step and wrote an email, voicing out my dissatisfaction in a harsh way. So immature of me!

I hate this 'jambatan roboh' situation, either with close friends, collegues or anybody! What's my next course of action? Wanted to talk to him face to face at first, but seriously I'm not good at it. I can be too emotional, or even cry (I dont want to do that infront of a male collegue!) and I'm scared that situation might be worse by facing him 'live'. So, I decided to wrote him an email to apology for sending him such harsh email. I guess email (or anythg written for that matter) is the best way of communicating your feelings especially when situation like this occur. I always do that with Bro Frank too when we had argument and it worked out well. So, there goes an email to him..now, waiting for his reply, if ever he will..

*****************************************************

He replied my email. Yey! Phewwwwhhh..I've been expecting this to come. As a friend, he did give me some piece of advice (with such a powerful choice of word..I dont know that he's English is so damn good!). If he was to give his piece of mind 'live', I might be crying infront of him now..Darnnn..

Basically, what he told me, Bro Frank has countlessly told me. And most of the things he said, I already know. As a reminder, I guess I'll list some of the things here (so Bro Frank could read too):-

1. "What goes around comes around". To use strong remark to others may result in such unpleasant circumstances towards ourself and that's why we have to really think hard before accusing others of such thing. True enough! It doesn't make us feel good

2. In this world, no matter how hard we try, we may never get all that we wanted. So, accepting what we have or don't have is a virtue of life.

3. Accepting others as what they are like what u want others to accept u as what u are. Sometimes, if we have to bite our toungue, step back into the shadow and swallow our pride in order to avoid conflicts or hurt feeling of others, so let it be.

4. Life is complicate if we wanted it to be, and life will be so beautiful if we can start the day with a smile. I like this!

So, I guess that's it! He said what he have to say. Eventhough it's like a knife thru my heart, I took it positively.

To my collegue (if he's reading this), I can't promise there will be no jambatan roboh lagi after this. But, on my part, I'll do my best to avoid such unnecessary conflicts. Senang cerita, sabarlah sikit Rafiqah. Bro Frank dah several times remind u that, but u never learn, do u?