Releasing the anger within.

Our 4-month-old Innova was knocked by Vios yesterday at Jln Tun Razak! The lady driver apologised for her mistake as she was looking elsewhere (probably SMSiNg) and did not notice that our car has slowed down and stopped. Idiot! And I am glad that it was a bumper-to-bumper crawl so it was a soft knock. But that does not mean that our car was left unscar. Eventhough it is slightly dented, but the thought that the car is considered very new (only 4 months old) makes us all very dissapointed that it happens!

But the impact has hit hubby the most. He has gone ballistic over the whole incident! He has lost his appetite yesterday eventhough I served him his favourite asam pedas (courtesy of mak, thank you). Our topic yesterday lingered on these subject ONLY - how the accident happened, that lady driver, the repair, the police report..I tried to divert his attention to the issue by coming out with new topics, but it is back to square one after few minutes. Even Ashraff's first-time calling him Ayah does not excite him!

Can't blame him for that as he has been taking care of that precious gem like his own baby. But u see, some things are beyond our control. Just like our case. Kalau nak kena, kena jugak.... What to do...

Now we have to drive that dented MPV back to Pontian tomorrow..Gee..

P.S: Will post a picture later, folks!

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What is your opinion when I say most Malaysians are last minute people? Give me a break, I am Malaysian too. But if you notice, Malaysian will wait till the eleventh hour to settle its bills, pay their taxes..and now the MyKad thing..

If you happened to watch the news, you will see some of the standard feedbacks given by these proscrastinators when they were interviewed:-

(i)"Dulu, takde masa.." - so now you have all the time in the world to wait for almost the whole day waiting for just a piece of plastic card to be issued?! And sometimes more because you might not have a luck to obtain an angka giliran the first time you went (ni case my sisterlah, sampai 4 kali pergi baru dapat nombor).

(ii)"JPN sepatutnya buka lebih banyak kaunter dan memperbanyakkan angka giliran." Hellloooo...look who's talking...

Sorry if this offended anyone here, but sometimes we have to put the blame on ourselves rather than pointing fingers to other. And now JPN staffs have to burn the midnight oil just to clear all last minute MyKad applications. Poor thing!

I'm glad I did my MyKad way back in 2002. Yup dear, it's 3 years ago! Well, I'm not a super-duper obedient citizen but I was forced to do it. Why? Because my purse was stolen while I was praying at Sogo's surau! A blessing in disguise indeed. Or else, I might be the one who is currently waiting in a long queue at JPN...

P.S : Have you apply for your MyKad? It's two days to go!

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Mak called me at my office this morning. We had a long chit-chat over the phone. Something which I never thought I would do with her. It was nice to hear her voice. Yeah, I miss her..and Abah too..
She told me that she wanted to go to our house today as Abah is missing Ashraff badly (Mak went to our house yesterday while I was at work to send asam pedas but Abah can't make it). And she asked us to drop by at her house today to pick up Ashraff and Bibik and have dinner together..Well, how can I say NO..

P.S: Izreen, you tagged me hah? Sorry babe, I overlooked. Next entry ok?!

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HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!
MAY YOU HAVE A GOOD YEAR AHEAD!
From,
Rafiqah & Co.

From Landed Property to High-Rise Building..

Alhamdulillah. We have officially moved to our own home. Although there is still lot of decorations to make as the walls are pretty bare, but we are glad to call it OUR HOME.

It took us two days to carry our stuffs, which mainly consists of our clothings back and forth from Ampang to Cheras. I left some of my clothes which I hardly wear because I believe that there won't be enough space for me to put them in our now smaller room. I did make a correct decision! We used to have a walk-in cabinet and a stand-alone cupboard at my parent's and now we have to deal with just three doors of built-in cabinet with few drawers, and we have to share it with our lil Ashraff! We would not want to carry Ashraff's own cabinet as there is no possible way for us to position that thing in our room.

And another thing, we could not bring Ashraff's favourite cot along too. We were thinking of co-sharing the bed with him (a good idea?) but our bed is queen size and not king size like what we used to have, so three is a crowd on the bed. So now my lil lad has to settle himself comfortably sleeping on the floor. Poor thing! I called it 'Rumah Setinggan'..hehehe..
Since he is not used to the new environment and I'm pretty much afraid he'll roll-over and swept the whole room, both of us ended up restless during our first few nights there. Gee..

Then finally, on Sunday night, everything is nicely transferred and arranged. As I take the final look before I stepped out from my previous room, there is this weariness feeling inside me. The room which I have been occupying for the past 15 years of my life is now empty. It is even sadder to look at Abah's face when we handed over their house key. Mak decided to go back to Johor Bharu for no specific reason but Atok Lon (my aunty who is living with me) told me that Mak would not want to see us leave. I am not trying to be extra-melancholic here (as Ampang and Cheras are not that far anyway), but it was indeed a sad moment for me...

Then starting Monday, we have comfortably settling in. I started to cook for lunch (make it extra so I don't have to cook for dinner). We had a jolly good time bringing Ashraff for a swim. I wanted to put on my swimming attire and join the fun, but it is bright sunny evening and I am getting a bit too self-concious with my bulging tummy, so I decided to do it at night. Not that night, some other night. Probably tonight.

Then we have this gymnasium which I so look forward to have my regular exercise. But I need someone to actually do some physical check-up and advise me on the right machine to use. Perhaps I can try to have a peek at the Equilibrium Gym that is situated at Maju Junction.

Oh yeah, tonite, our community will have somesort of AGM meeting to pick the new committee for the people at Mentari Kondominium. For the first time, we would be able to make it, insyaAllah. I am so looking forward to get to know our neighbours.

I have to say that I am slowly adapting to the change in environment. There is still teeny weeny sorrow in me to be leaving my parent whom I know are badly missing their grandson at this very moment, I know I have to accept this. And hope Mak and Abah will be able to adjust with their new life without me, Fitri and Ashraff.

One thing that I know will take me a very looongggg time to accept is what used to be 20 mins journey back home from the office is now taking a whole 1 hour of our precious time! Cheras, Cheras, you definitely need elevated highway like we had in Ampang...

Entering a new life..

Finally, we are moving in to our OWN home sweet home in Cheras. Dearest Hubby decided that once and for all, without further delay, this long holiday will be used to transfer all our things from mak & abah's house in Bukit Antarabangsa, Ampang to our condominium in Bandar Tasik Permaisuri, Cheras, which has been completed in early 2003.

For the past 6 months, we have been going back and forth from my parent's house to our house. Weekdays in Ampang, and weekends in Cheras. I found it a bit too taxing for us to maintain two houses, with half of our things here and half there. There will be times when I searched high and low for my long skirt or pants, and eventually realised that I left it at our house in Cheras. Darn..

Soon, insyaAllah, gone are the days where we have to switch from one place to the other. Along it will be the days where our dinner is ready everytime we get back from work. Hubby has insisted me to cook for dinner every night regardless of how late we get back from work. So now, I would have to learn to become a master of the kitchen, something which I don't quite like doing but I know responsibility is a responsibility. And a wife gotta do what the husband wants her to do..So I am fine with that.

But one thing that touches my heart is my mak and abah's reaction towards us moving out from the house. This is partly the reason why we have been postponing our plan for such a looonngggg time. Mind you, it's 2 1/2 years of delay! Everytime when we brought up this issue, mak will either keep quiet throughout the dinner or abah will make the remark "pindah-pindah abah tak nak dengar." So, we were torn between our plan and mak & abah's feeling. And we still are..

And now with Ashraff around, it makes things harder. For example, last night, while watching the TV with mak & abah, Ashraff as usual will dance and jumping around the living hall, with his usual shriek of excitement. Abah then said "Tak lama lagi senyaplah rumah kita ye Adah (gelaran abah untuk mak)." And mak will give her usual gloomy look...Haiyaa..

Despite that, I WANT us to move. I insisted we move. I had a slow woman-to-woman talk with mak one night. I told her my attention to move is the only way for me to become a real wife to Fitri (not that I am not real, but at least it's time for me to take charge of the household). Apart from that, I pity my hubby. Staying with my parent, has one way or another hinders his side of family to come and lepaking with us at our house since it is not our OWN house. Not that my husband complained but I can sense it (macam bagus je..)

And then I said something which is rather adverse, but somehow makes sense to my mother. I told her, it is the evolution of life. We must put at the back of our mind that all our children will leave us one day to go on with their lives. She left my tok mak as soon as she married my father years ago. And now it is time for me to go on with my life. And soon there will come a time where Ashraff will move away from me. But moving to a new house, does not mean that we are moving away for good. We will still come back here once in a while (or probably every weekend). Cheras and Ampang are not that far anyway.

With this, she had not made a single comment when I finally put a strong footing saying I am moving to Cheras this Christmas holiday. And suprisingly, Abah too. She must have told Abah about our rationale to move in one of their husband-and-wife talks at night..hehehe..

So here we are, finally, packing our stuffs to our own adobe (quoting Mrs Corporate Tai-Tai) and entering a new life...Semoga Allah merahmati perjalanan hidup kami ini..

Just in case you are wondering now, which i am sure you are, insyaAllah there will be a house-warming makan-makan at our house. Will keep u posted on this one.

Oh by the way, despite our busyness to move this weekend, we, I mean CMOG will be opening a stall at Sunday Flea Market @ Kelab Ukay, Bukit Antarabangsa from 8 a.m. to 8 p.m. So if you happen to be somewhere in this area, please drop by...

It's a good start.

Yesterday, I managed to control my appetite and took less food. Here's what I had yesterday:-

Breakfast
A bar of muesli and a mug of milo (less sugar, add my fav soy protein powder).

Lunch
A quarter plate of rice only (usually it will be a full plate) and spent most of the times, gatah lauk sahaja. It was pretty hard for me not to eat rice with lauk, but I managed to resist my food temptations. Yey!

Dinner
A quarter plate of rice plus the normal lauk-pauk. Double yey!

I planned to reduce my calorie intake gradually instead of indulging in self-stalvation method. So from a full plate of rice (sometimes double plate) to a quarter plate is a good start for me. Am so proud of myself!

Now I am into studying the food pyramid to ensure that I have a well-balanced diet. I do not want to end-up like a collegue of mine who fainted right in the middle of the office, as she is too obsessed with losing weight and chose crash diet method. Ouch!

Let me see whether my effort yield any return at the end of the day. Perhaps next Friday is a good day for me to jump on the weighing scale. Do remind me, yeah buddy..

As for Ashraff, he is still carrying the motto "Say 'NO' to FOOD!". Guess it is a good time for me to join his campaign..

"Ibu, No!".."Ashraff, please..."

The sign above signifies Ashraff's motto for the past three days. He is back in his no-mood-to-eat mood, leaving his mother totally devastated! I am so sick worried of his weight, that is for certain. After the drop of 1 kilo due to the Mouth Disease he had earlier, he never actually regain his weight. He is still at 10kg++, which is considered low for toddler his age and for a baby who was born at 3.74kg!

One thing that somesort of ease my mind is that he drinks lots of milk as compared to before. All these while, he has been depending on small bottle (the 4oz bottle) for each milk time. Lately, his consumption has shoot up to 6-7 oz (at one time 9oz) per session. So, I guess he must have substitute the solid with milk. But any mother will freak out to the fact that their child would not have sufficient nutrition from depending on milk ONLY.

It is also pretty hard for me to deal with picky eater like Ashraff, whom will only eat from the ready packed food like Nestle or Gerber. He will puke whenever he takes the home-cooked meal, no matter how we vary the ingredients. After sometime, we sort of acknowledge the fact that cooking for him is just a waste of time (and gas).

Then, a friend of mine told me that maybe he wants to eat like any adults would, coz now he has lots of teeth. And I thought that maybe he is bored of eating the normal Nestle or Gerber products that we gave him - gandum campur soya, gandum campur madu, mixed fruits, beras & ayam etc, as he has been consuming that for the past one year. Perhaps I should try something with a more substance in it.

Here is a recipe that I got from a friend (thanks Ivy!) that I would love to try:-

"You can try making your own chicken nuggets. Blitz some chicken breast (no skin of course) in the food processor, campur with fresh bread crumbs sikit (one piece fresh bread, blitz in the food processor), add an egg yolk, some herbs if you like, a tiny pinch of salt - or not and mix. Then dunk it in egg and breadcrumbs and saute with olive oil"

Sounds yummylicious, aye?!.

I hope my effort to make Ashraff eat is pay-off this time around. Or else, it will be another round of waste-time-and-waste-gas.

Sometimes I wonder, apart from the joy of having children, parenting job also comes with a bag of worries. For the past 16 months, there have been countless time I have to deal with anxiety attack. I told my mother that probably if Ashraff can talk and voice out his feelings, I will stop worrying. My mother's reply was "Tak jugak. Kita hanya akan stop fikir dan risau pasal anak-anak hanya apabila kita dah mati." Guess I have to agree with her...

As for now, Ashraff deary, please eat...

How to back-up?

Today is a peaceful day for me. Hardly any client calling in, asking what is their balance outstanding, or pouring their problems in meeting their loan obligations. Can be because of the holiday for the State of Selangor...

I do not have much to do either. I have finished doing the disbursement proposal, have submitted the follow-up report and fulfilling client's request for 1001 things (selagi boleh they will request). If I'm motivated enough, probably I can start doing some of the 'forecasted' work like loan foreclosure for some bad loans, but I chosed not too.

Instead, I spent my precious free time, going through my archives, reading all my rants and rambles in the past. Some are funny, some are pretty sad, some are what-the-heck-are-u-thinking-at-that-time..

Having done so, it dawned to me that I do not do any back-up for my precious entries. How do I do back up yeah? Any advise for an IT idiot like me? Thanks!

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Just got an email from my collegue. It's my boss invitation for free pizza. He treats us every month. I missed the last one as I was on 'puasa enam', and it's a big dugaan at that time since I've been longing to have one. Now this is the time for me to whallop some of the best pizzas in town by the name of Free Pizza!
There goes my diet...

Shed them off!!

One day at the surau..

"Rafiqah, just want to ask you something. There's this rumour going around saying that you are pregnant. Betul ke?"

My immediate response was..

"Gemuk sangat ke saya ni?"

Why am I not suprise? It is because that was not the first comment I got regarding my weight lately. Some of the comments I received were:-

"Eh, eh, dah gemuklah you sekarang" - a straightforward one.
"Eh, lama tak jumpa dah berisi sikit ye. Dulu kurus je" - this one is trying to cover line by using words like "berisi", "naik badan" etc.
"Gemuklah kau sejak kawin. Mendadak pulak tu naik!" - this one really 'dropped my water face'. Remark given by a man, in a lift full of other men. Geee!!
"Dah 'berisi' ke?" - asking whether I'm pregnant, which is definitely due to the weight.
"Cantiklah awak sejak dah ada anak ni. Berseri-seri. Kalau dulu muka cengkung, badan pun kurus semacam" - This one I like best! *grinning like kerang busuk*

Yes, I have to admit (eventhough still in a denial stage) that my weight has increased a lot..yes, A LOT after I stopped breastfeeding Ashraff. Previously, my weight was..emmm..let me see, the most was 45 kilos. And I've had a hard time maintaining that weight, as I'm scared I will become thinner and look like cicak kubing. It becomes worsen after the fasting month or after recovering from illnesses like severe coughing (which drains out your energy) or diarrhea. Muka cengkung semacam!

Whenever I look at fashion & beauty magazine, all they talk about is weight loss but seldom touches on how to gain some weight. Do you know the Appeton Weight Gain available at all major pharmacies? I always had the urge to consume those, but my close friend stopped me from doing that as she said it may cause your weight to keep on increasing (something which she learns from other people's experience). I remembered what she told me..

"You kahwin dulu, dapat anak, then tengok whether you still kurus lagi ke tak?"

And my stubborn answer was..

"Tak mungkin! My parent jenis yang kurus and I doubt I can increase any weight"

Yeah right! Look what I've become now!

Now my weight is fifty..errr..ahh! I better not disclosed. But to give you the hint, it is towards the end of '50' scale. Isn't that scary??

If before I try to avoid jumping on the weighing scale because I'm scared that the pointer will move further left from the previous one, now I am scared of the opposite. I do not know what actually happened. My eating habit is just like before. My suspect would be because of a decrease in metabolism rate, probably due to age factor. What am I suppose to do now?

Basically to shed some fats you have to do the following:-
(i) To control calories intake. Have a healthy diet!
(ii) To exercise regularly.

Let me see whether I can do these things:-
(i) Healthy Diet - Currently, I am actively searching the net for the right food to eat. I would not want to skip meals as I don't think my minor gastric problem can tolerate that. Anyone willing to share me some diet menu and tip?

My biggest hurdle would be my high food temptation! You see, I am so used to eating whenever or whatever I want to eat without worrying about my weight. So, it is really hard for me to control my desire to consume favourite foods like fried chicken, nasi beriyani. That's a No-No right?

(ii) Exercise. Yes, but not regularly. I just could not find way to discipline myself when it comes to exercising. I feel like enrolling to any good fitness club where they have this trainer who can give your professional advice. But then, my financial will go haywire and I don't think dearest Hubby will allow that. Then again, would I have the discipline to drag my feet to the fitness club every now and then?

Yeah, I'm still thinking of ways for me to exercise..and discipline myself to exercise.

Don't you think the slimming centres ads in the media is very attractive for someone who has weight problem? For me, yes it is! Especially the one with celebrities like Amy Mastura - losing from xx kilos to xx kilos. Do you think those places are effective?

Guess it is a bit too early for New Year's resolution but I do have few things in mind. One, is definitely to lose some weight. I would not want to look as thin as before but just to reach an ideal weight that I am comfortable with. But what if I am pregnant next year? That will be a different story altogether..

Good luck to me! Any tips and advice are most welcome.