It’s been a while since I blog about them. So, expect a loooong entry this time around. More of it is just for my own personal record.
Ashraff vs Aliff
(sorry Eiseai, curi idea you for this sub-heading)Even when I'm pregnant with Aliff, I have somesort of an instinct that the two will be different in terms of characters, judging from the "action" in my tummy. My instinct is right. Here's to sum up some of their differences, right from my pregnancy days:-
1. Ashraff in the tummy - moving actively in the tummy throughout the day. Aliff in the tummy - not that active and I can tell when he's having his nap.
2. Ashraff in tummy - from 12 am and above, hardly any movement. I got a peaceful sleep. True enough, he was a good night baby. Aliff in tummy - active at night, so I know he's not a good night sleeper. True, he's a restless sleeper. Makes all sorts of sounds at night that makes me want to check on him all the time.
3. Ashraff in tummy - pregnancy was a breeze. Aliff in tummy - Quite a bad first trimester, from spotting to thruout-the-day sickness.
4. Ashraff - can latch on (breastfeed) easily. An active nurser. Aliff - took him some time to learn the art of breastfeeding. A lazy one. Will fall asleep everytime he latched on, and will wake up the minute I put him down.
5. Ashraff - a demanding baby. Kuat nangis from day one. Masa dalam pantang cam serik nak beranak lagi. It was so intense and highly stressful during the day (malam dia tidur). The only place that makes him nap longer is on my chest, so I can have a rest too. He sleeps on my chest till he's a giant 6-mo baby. He needs to be carried all the time.
Aliff - a relatively easy baby, alhamdulillah.
6. Ashraff - may be a demanding baby at first. But as he grew up, he was easier to handle. Aliff - works the other way around. Demanding as he gets older.
7. Ashraff - fairly easy to train him to use car seat. Aliff - sampai sekarang will cry and scream as we strap him in car seat.
8. Ashraff - loves stroller. Aliff - hates stroller, loves baby sling. Till now, we are using the sling to carry him around.
9. Ashraff - loves to be center of attention. Loves the crowd. Aliff - clingy. Stress je bila nampak ramai orang.
10. Ashraff - A picky eater. At one time, he only depends on milk (I think I blogged about it long time ago). Aliff - loves to eat, tolak batu & kayu je. Itupun hari tu, sikit lagi dia nak makan batu.
11. Ashraff - loud. Aliff - the quiet type.
12. Ashraff - could not sit still, what more focus. Aliff - can focus a lot longer.
13. Ashraff - soft skills (living skills) ada slow sikit - pandai bukak pintu at the age of 2 1/2 yo, pandai bukak kasut pun lebih kurang 2 1/2, can only eat with his own hands at the age of 2 and using fork and spoon at the age of 3. Sampai sekarang tak pandai pakai seluar sendiri or kasut sendiri. Pedal bicycle pun tak tahu lagi.
Because they are so different in every way (even the looks), I am now expecting everything to be the opposite so I have to get ready with tactics and ways to handle it should Aliff meets my expectation, for e.g.
1. Ashraff - only scribble on paper. Aliff - maybe he'll scribble on wall, sofa etc. (Omigod!)
2. Ashraff - No seperation anxiety on first day of school. Aliff - maybe he'll cry and cry..and I have to berkampung kat sekolah itu utk beberapa hari?
Negative betullah Ibu ni!
Ashraff & Aliff
Although they differ in terms of characters and development, they are still brothers.
They adore each other. They are inseperable.
Ashraff loves to give smooches on Aliff's tembun cheeks. And Aliff will show his affection by coming to Ashraff and shove his head to Ashraff’s face. More of like trying to kiss his brother but in quite a rough way.
If one saw the other lying down, he'll come and lie down too. And they will hold hands.
The adik will follow his brother. If they brother jump on the bed (which I don't quite like), the adik will jump too. So they jump together. Two lil cheeky monkeys on my bed, jumping and laughing. Really make my day!
If the brother read book, the adik will try to get a book (usually the same book the brother is reading), so they read book together. If it's of the same book, then Ashraff will "read" to his brother, and his brother will try to imitate the words Ashraff says. Of course, that's is when the brother is in good mood to share. Or else...berentaplah apa lagi.
They'll play together. They're most favourite place is under the dining table. Actually masa kecik dulu Ashraff tak pandai main bawah meja, but since Aliff loves to play under there, Ashraff tags along.
Their secret hiding place is always the walk-in cabinet inside my room. They'll both sneak in, and when they're in, I usually can't hear a sound. So, after few seconds, I got scared, and tried to open the door. And I found them both lying on the floor, having lots of fun. There's this one time Ashraff says to Aliff "Ibu's coming. Syhhhh....". And I'll pretend I didn't know where they are by saying "Where's Ashraff? Where's Aliff?". And I can hear them giggling inside the cabinet. Usually the adik will break free, and come running to me. Then Abang will be frustrated and said "Alaaa...Aliff ni tak pandailah....".
Those were my best moments..my stress reliever after a hard day at work. No amount of massage or relflexeology could beat that.
But of course, those were the good moments. How about the not-so-nice part?
The not-so-nice part involves a fight, screaming and whining of a 3 yo and 1 yo boys.
Ashraff was known to be the biggest bully in the house, and to Aliff especially. But now, Aliff knows how to play equal. He can defend for his right. And he can even bully Ashraff in return.
He wants almost anything that is in Ashraff’s hands, eventhough it is exactly the same looking toys or pencil or whatever. Nope, we can’t substitute with anything else. Either Ashraff has to give up, or Aliff will continue screaming for that thing. Berentap dengan abang dia. Pening kepala makcik!
He is also a great destroyer when it comes to almost anything, and yang selalu jadi mangsa is Ashraff’s toys or books. Kejap-kejap tercabut kaki, kejap-kejap hilang tayar, kejap-kejap koyak and lagi worst, pecah berderai terus. For the past 3 years, the book is in condition. Sampai kat tangang Aliff, bang! terburai. Ashraff goes berserk everytime that happens. The short-tempered brother will push Aliff till he falls down..and sometimes bang his head on the table sharp edges (!). But that lil boy hardly cries. Dengan muka dek, dia akan bangun and cuba ambik barang tu semula. Ibu goes berserk as well…hahaha…
Well, I guess the love-hate relationship is normal between siblings. Cuma I need to improve myself on how I can handle the "hate" part. I'm currently reading a book "Raising Boys" loaned by my friend. Interesting...and a must have for parents with boys. Probably it can help me in raising my two boys in a more healthy environment. I just wish I have more time with them to really understand them.
Oh, I just hang my boys picture in this small cubicle of mine in the office. It's indeed a stress reliever and a source for motivation for me. It also makes me want to go back home..like right now!