Monday, October 31, 2005

Hari Raya datang lagi!

This is our Agenda for this year's Raya:-
Malam Raya and Pagi Raya - Rabu and Khamis
After two years of Raya as married couple, this is the first time I'm going to spend Raya eve and Raya morning with my own Mak and Abah at Tok Mak's house in Johor Bharu. Reason being, Tok Mak's house is emptier this year as most of my aunties and cousins will only be arriving petang Raya.
So, this year will only be shooting for Pontian after sembahyang raya. Spent the rest of the day there visiting mother-in-law's side of family.

Second Raya - Jumaat
Back to JB. Usually my Aunty Teh has her open house this day. Spent the day visiting my mother's side of family.

Third and Fourth Raya - Sabtu and Ahad
To Muar, visiting my father's side of family and some mother's (Mak and Abah are saudara after all, so sedara Mak is sedara Abah and vice versa). This is the best, yet the most tiring part of Raya. We visited around 10 houses per day. Hope Ashraff can tolerate that..

Fifth Raya - Isnin
To Felda area in Kulai, visiting my late father-in-law's side of family. It's not Felda Taib Andak, mind you..or else, we might be bumping into Mawi..Then, we will head off to Pasir Gudang, again FIL's family.

Sixth Raya - Selasa
Planned to go to Singapore to visit again FIL's side of family, but Ashraff does not have a passport yet. So, probably we will spend the day resting in Pontian.

Seventh Raya - Rabu
Heading of to KL...will be back to work on Thursday..


To all, Selamat Hari Raya AidilFitri..And Maaf Zahir Batin. To those yang balik kampung tu, do drive carefully..Till we meet again in this blog after Raya..
Daripada,
Rafiqah, Fitri and Ashraff

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Pursuing study?

This is an interesting blog quiz..Thanks Fina for the lead..

You Should Get a PhD in Science (like chemistry, math, or engineering)

You're both smart and innovative when it comes to ideas.
Maybe you'll find a cure for cancer - or develop the latest underground drug.


Updated on Monday, 31st October 2005, 8.30 a.m.:-
Been postponing to comment the above due to..what else, WORK!

Hei loookkk..Me and PHD in Science..Just what I've expected!
I never thought I'm a science kinda girl..But I love subjects that have objective answer, like Maths and Science. In fact, I was offered to pursue a Degree in Chemical Engineering in Canada by Mara, right after my SPM. But Abah wanted me to become a Chartered Practising Accountant..and Canada is just too far from Malaysia. "The furthest you can go is Australia", said Abah. So, I chosed the furthest..and took up Degree in Commerce (majoring in Accounting). Along the way, I got tired of accounting subjects and found out my love is more towards subjects like Economics, which uses lots of Statistics and Graphs. So, Abah's dream of seeing me becoming a CPA basically goes down the drain. But I make it up to him by marrying a guy who is on the verge of becoming a CPA:)

So, looking at the quiz result, it dawned to me that maybe I am a science person after all, though I hate to admit it (you know, people say that science people are stuck up and uncool). And perhaps, if I pursue my studies in science right after SPM, I might be working in a science lab somewhere, doing research to save the universe. To think of it again, what a boring job I would have!

I would rather utilise my right brain and do something more creative instead. I would enrol in sewing class and learn how to do some patchwork and embroidery..or learn how to use softwares like Adobe Illustrator or Pagemaker. Not that I'm a creative type of person as I seriously can't draw and not good with my hand either (kerastangan) but I appreciate art and beauty and just want to be apart of it.

Then again, where can I find TIME? I do not even have time to blog, for God's sake. One day, I will find you TIME and am going to make you work with me to fulfill my interest..

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

The Spirit of Raya..

"I'm excited to Raya this year, not like previous years where Raya is just a normal annual event" said Hubby.

"Why?"

"It's because of Ashraff. He's a big boy now..."

Yeah. Me and hubby are a more excited this year to celebrate Raya. As compared to last year, where Ashraff is just a helpless little baby, this year he is so much bigger. He can wear Baju Melayu Johor..sedodon with Hubby..He can walk, so we bought him one brand new kasut raya. Actually, hubby bought the shoes. He bought him a Clark shoes..CLARK, I tell you..and it costs him almost RM100!! And I do not know how long it will last..2 months, 3 months..
Hubby, if u r reading this..me also want one for Raya!!

Ibu on the other hand is near to broke..Where did the money go? To Ashraff's serba baru clothing of course! Let me see what I bought for him:-
- 3 pairs of jeans
- 1 belt
- 2 pyjamas
- countless no of Tshirts and shorts
- 1 checked shirt
- few new socks
- 1 baju melayu (sewn by mom-in-law).

Can't wait to see this little lad dress-up for Raya..He is more presentable this time around..and Ibu and Ayah are a bit too excited:)

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It's almost a ritual for me to bake some Raya cookies..My usual cookies are:-
(i) Chocolate Chip
(ii) Cheese Fingers

Last year, I was unable to bake as Ashraff was so fragile and small (3 months plus) and I do not have any helper to help me look after Ashraff while Ayah did his terawih at the mosque. So, this year, I am determined to continue baking cookies..

So far, I've baked two cookies:-
(i) Crunchy Jumbles - a combination of rice cereals, chocolate chip and coarsely chopped walnuts.
(ii) Cream Cheese Spiral - Cheesy cookies with sweet fillings made from walnut, brown sugar and ground cinnamon.

I'm taking leave this Thursday to bake another cookie - my normal Famous Amos Chocolate Chip.

And on Saturday, my usual Cheese Fingers.

And for the rest of the family:-
- Mak is baking Abah all-time-favourite Sultanas cookies..
- Mak Pontian (my mom-in-law) is baking kuih bangkit, suji and tart nenas (with homemade pineaple jam..Pontian has abundance supply of pineapples!)
- My sis-in-law is making the usual cornflakes madu and chocolate rice cereal..

Then we have barter trade between the besans..giving us a table full of homemade cookies!! A Blessing..

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Despite the high spirit of Raya, it is sad to see the bulan penuh keberkatan, Ramadhan passes..

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Me and Disney..

Thanks Izreen for giving me the lead to this..

You Are Snow White!
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Pure and trusting. You are a gentle soul who can get along with just about anyone. Everyone you meet instantly falls in love with you. How can they resist? You have a pure, lovable nature that's irresistable. Just don't trust everyone who comes across your path.

Which Disney Princess Are You?

Hei, helloooo...

Monday, October 17, 2005

A live-in Maid


Life before and after having a live-in maid

Before
1. Responsible for all the house chores - do laundry, ironing, cleaning the house, fold and arrange the newly washed clothes in our little cupboard..oh, a long list of houseworks...
2. Make sure that Ashraff is bathed, nicely dressed, fed.
3. Forced to drop everything when I heard hubby said "Ashraff nak tido..Dia tak nak tidur ngan I.." There I was, spending my half and hour time (sometimes more), putting my fighting-with-eyes son to sleep, while my mind kept thinking of the half-washed dishes in the sink, or the clothes that need to be hang.
4. Rushed back to finish off the things that I've left when Ashraff is asleep. Thought of taking a nap once mission is accomplished! About to doze off, when I heard Ashraff's voice. He's awake! Darnnnn...
5. My only oh-so-caring helper that time is dearest Hubby. He'll help me in everything (except for ironing and folding clothes). He even help me to take care of Ashraff if he sees that I'm so tired. What a bliss!
6. Ashraff looked up for me for almost everything (except for the happening stuffs like kicking some balls) - to put him to sleep, to feed him with milk, to carry him..
6. Time management is critical.
7. No time for TV, magazines, books..and movies (cinemas)..With a hubby and a high-need baby to take care off, who has time for oneself?

After
1. Most houseworks like laundry, ironing, folding the clothes are Bibik's responsibilty. Cooking is still mine:)
2. I have more time to spend quality time with hubby and Ashraff.
3. I do not feel guilty to live Ashraff with mak and abah during weekends as I have Bibik to take care of him. Instead of having to ask my orang tua to cope with an active toddler.
4. I have time for myself now - reading, watching my favourite TV show, facial, hair treatment..name it!
5. I can see that Ashraff is getting closer with his Bibik. He does not looked up to me if he wants to sleep or to be carried..I can sense that my jealousy is building up..
6. No excuse of feeling tired..
7. I can feel that I'm starting to be dependent on her..I wonder if I'm able to resume my role of a bionic wife and mother if she's not around..
8. I am more relaxed in handling Ashraff's tantrums and fulfilling hubby's demand. Probably because I feel more energetic.

But one thing good about having a maid, me and hubby can go to the cinema to watch movie again without having to live our high-need toddler with mak and abah (like they care).
Yesterday, we watched movies together at TGV, KLCC after leaving the arena for 1 year plus! The last movie we had before yesterday was Shrek 2, when at that time I was heavily pregnant with Ashraff. We missed lots of good movies during the 1 year interval, some of which including Starwars (Episode 3)! Not to say that we feel bad about it, because the opportunity cost (economic terms for best alternative forgone when a particular action is taken) for not watching movies is extra time for our baby. But hey..for a movie-goers like us, we just HAVE TO...(are we bad parent or what?). So, the FLIGHTPLAN yesterday put an end to our long-awaited moment for a good movie...Have u watch that movie?

Next in line according to Hubby is GOAL! featuring famous football stars like David Beckham and Zidane..A must watch movie for football fans like us:)

Friday, October 14, 2005

Five Love Languages

Are you and your spouse speaking the same language?
He sends you flower but all you really want is time to talk. She gives you a hug but what you really need is a home-cooked meal. The problem is not the love - it is your love language!

According to Dr Gary Chapman, an experienced marriage counsellor, people tend to express and receive love in different ways, which is known as love language.
Just like having one comfortable language to use i.e. our mother's tongue, the same applies to love language. Sometimes our mother's tongue is different from our spouse's, thus, we have problem to talk. However, we tried to learn and communicate with our spouse's language and the same goes for him, just to make each other happy and comfortable. The same goes for love. If you want to feel connected to your Other Half, than try to learn and speak his love languages.

In his 20 years of counselling, Dr Chapman identified five love languages, such as follows:-

Act of Service
If you insist that your spouse do this and that, like helping you to prepare dinner, or wash the clothes, or vacumm the floor, ACT OF SERVICE is considered your love languages. By having your other half to perform the service, you felt loved by him. Or like what Dr. Chapman used to say "your love tank is full".

This works vice versa. If you other half concerns whether you do what you are supposed to do, then that might be his love language. Speak his love language, and he will feel love and willingly to give love in return.

Quality Time
If your spouse emphasis on having quality time with you, like having romantic dinner together, playing badminton together, going for a vacation together, then "Quality Time" is his love language.

Receiving Gifts
Oh yeah, this is nothing else but giving and receiving gifts. If u see that your Other Half loves to give u gift, without any specific occassion, then Receiving Gifts might be his love language.
I know a couple who have never given any gift to each other even during special occassion. And they survived for more than 15 years of marriage (till todate), which means they have different type of love language. Perhaps the next one..

Words of Affirmation
Words speaks louder than action. This is for people who has this type of love languages. Praise them, encouraged them, and they will feel love all over and are willingly to give love in return (usually by giving words of affirmation as well since that is their love language).

Physical Touch
Hold their hands, hug them, touch their face..just to make them feel love. If you find out that your spouse likes to hug you or hold your hand, eventhough you are not comfortable with that (perhaps you like flower/cake as an alternative), then you can tell that is his love language. So, to make him feel love, learn how to hold him and touch him always. That is sure to make him feel connected to you..

So, what is your love language? Basically, if you are incline to express love in a certain way, perhaps by praising him, then words of affirmation is your love language.
How about your Other Half? It takes time for you to find out actually. Living and being with him, u will be able to know. Like me, I always watch out for the things that triggers an argument between us. Usually, this is because of difference in love language. I got to know that my hubby's love language is "Act of Service". He expects me to take charge of household chores - cook, keep the house cleans etc. He does not care if I forget to buy him present for his birthday, or praise him if he wear something different, or spending quality time with him, or even hug him occassionally. Yang penting my service as a wife (service, service ni jangan pikir lain ye..). You should see how happy and satisfied he is if I cook for him!

My love language is something different. I don't mind if he does not help me with the housechores or forget to do something which I asked him to do. But if he does not do this one thing...memang panas! I don't feel the love coming from him at all! What is it, dear? I think you should know by now..After all, we have been married for almost three years..

Hope this is a good topic for married (and soon-to-be married) couples. Feel like writing something more educational today. By the way, your children also have different love languages..Abang lain, akak lain, adik lain..so it is up to us parents to tackle it..

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

The month of Ramadhan

When was the last time I blog? I seriously could not find time to even check my email lately and what more with updating my blog and blog hopping..
Today, I just need to write...so here I am..

I hope it's not too late for me to wish all my Muslim friends, SELAMAT BERPUASA di Bulan Ramadhan yang mulia ini..

Don't u think the foods in Pasar Ramadhan have increased this year?

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Ashraff has finally able to sleep lying down, with me patting him to sleep. U might be wondering how he slept previously. Well, we had to cradle him while tawafing the room. I ended up having an achy body and arm every morn. Ashraff is a high need baby who basically has this twelve features - intense, hyperactive, draining (drain mom&dad's energy), feeds frequently, demanding, awaken frequently, unsatisfied, unpredictable, super-sensitive, "can't pun baby down", not a self-soother and seperation sensitive (U can check this link to know more about this type of baby).

How do I get to know he's the high-need type? Basically, I was extremely tired from day One of Ashraff's life (with all the 12 features, who wouldn't feel so?). Family members also made comment that it's rather rare to see baby who is like Ashraff. Rather sad with the remarks, I took the initiative to surf the net, looking for information on baby personalities. That is how I got to know that my Ashraff falls under the category 'high-need'. From then on, I accepted Ashraff as what he is and try not to compare with other babies (altho I could not help but feeling jealous seeing baby just lying comfortably in the stroller while mama does her shopping).

But one thing for sure, I'm still waiting for Ashraff to be able to sleep on his own. So, when it somesort of happened last week, I'm extremely thrilled (I mentioned "somesort" because I still have to pat him to sleep, so not actually "on his own" yet). But that is better than carrying an 11 kg baby around the house for 30 mins..*sigh*..Alhamdulillah

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SME BANK BERHAD was launched on 3rd October 2005. Since that day, we at Ground Floor have to entertain on average 40 walk-in enquiries per day (which is like 3-4 customers per officer). Kering tekak woo!. But I find the job interesting, as I got to know lots of blooming entreprenuers who have 1001 ideas and strategies to ensure that their business succeeds. And some are clueless in business but have the intention to start one. Here I play an advisory role, and consult them on how they can go about in business, what are the challenges and what are their funding options. Really interesting!

Basically, just for your knowledge, here at SME Bank we are concentrating more on Bumiputra companies. We could finance manufacturing and services industry. However, for special funds such as Siswazah funds (for newly grads who want to start biz) and Ekonomi Desa funds (business located at luar bandar), we could also go into financing of trading business. So, if any of u who want to start a small scale business like a tuition center, kedai menjahit, restaurant, u can drop by at my Bank to ask..

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CreateMyOwnGift still going strong. Now we have three dealers - in Gombak, Bangi and Seremban. Currently, we are working on a new product, expected to be launched next year. Just to give a hint, it is a personalized children wear from 1 to 6 yo!! We have personalized birthday wear as well (famygirl, need your help to promte this to your client, can aahh??). Will come out with a mailing list so we could update our customers with latest news and products..Since non of us at CMOG is IT Savvy, so lambatlah sikit nak set-up mailing database ni...

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Guess I have killed my ketagihan to blog, with such a long-winded entry..God knows when I'll be able to write again..